Telling other people about what you are experiencing
Different people have different reactions to being told they have dementia. For some people the first reaction is to tell someone else, perhaps a spouse, partner or child. Other people keep it to themselves, perhaps because they feel there is no one they can tell, or because they don't want to upset people they are close to.
It is very important to talk about it. Once your family and friends know about the diagnosis they can support you. They might find it hard to believe at first and may be upset by the news. This will make it even more difficult for you. Try to discuss matters in a calm way. When you talk to your family and friends, try and see only one or two at a time. Find a quiet place to sit down to talk.
Your family and friends may feel privileged to be given the opportunity to help. Try to share what you are experiencing: share your diagnosis, explain about dementia and how it affects you, share your feelings of anger, anxiety or helplessness. Others may have feelings they would like to share with you as well. You may want to tell other people what they can do to make your life easier. For example, ask them to give you time to find the right word, or take you grocery shopping once a week if you can't drive. You may also find it helpful to tell people what you don't find helpful; for example, you might not like them doing everything for you.
Many people feel relieved after the diagnosis, because now there is a reason for their memory problems. There may be things that you want to say to certain people or you may have things to ask of them in the future. It helps if people can know what your wishes are but do not ask for promises from people which may be hard to keep.
